Give it to someone else

Your idea does nothing on a shelf

Disclaimer: This article is produced for entertainment and informational purposes only. It is not a substitute for the help of a licensed mental health professional or therapist.

If you, or anyone you know, is struggling, seek help immediately from the Samaritans or local emergency services.

It was a silence that did it.

Sat staring at the wall, realising how much I’d packed into the first hours of the day.

I wanted to feel guilty.

But I couldn’t for once.

And you know what?

It had nothing to do with how productive my morning was.

Let me tell you.

The shelf

There’s a place we put our best ideas.

The ones we like to observe and admire.

A shrine to an ideal.

If only I wrote that book, I’d be this sort of person.

If only I had that job, I’d be this.

If only.

If only.

It’s out of reach on purpose.

And impossible for anyone else to see.

Want to know mine?

Think again

The story that didn’t make it

As you probably know by now, I’m a budding novelist.

And my first attempt at a full length novel barely stretched to fifty thousand words.

That’s hardly epic fantasy.

But I completed it, shared it with people.

And came to realise, after the fourth round of edits, I’d bitten off more than I could chew.

At the tender age of fifteen, I didn’t have the skills to achieve what I wanted.

So I started working on my craft.

Other stories, other mediums.

Theatre scripts to sharpen my dialogue (because there’s nowhere to hide on stage).

Poetry to expand my metaphors.

Reading to inform character arcs.

And still, that story sat on the shelf.

Until the day it didn’t.

Why then?

At that point, I’d run my own writers workshops for over a year.

Supported other writers to get interviews on BBC Radio.

Had a rehearsed reading at the Bristol Old Vic.

And I honestly couldn’t answer when someone said one night, as I told them the premise and the world and the message of the thing:

Sounds great. Can’t wait to read it.

My first reaction was to regret saying anything.

Because that made it clearer than anything else.

After all this time.

I’d finally run out of excuses.

You’re forgiving the wrong people

Get off the shelf

Listen, I’m not saying you have to tell everyone.

I’m not saying share the recipe, or your working out.

But it doesn’t have to be positive to inspire action.

The point is not to get smoke blown up your arse.

It’s to get perspective.

On whether this is something you care about in theory.

Or if you dare to care in practice.

But don’t tell me you’d be different if only - if only.

It isn’t different and it doesn’t need to be.

You’re better than that.

And you deserve to know yourself better.

In thyself I trust

I didn’t get the novel published, in the end.

But it no longer haunts me like it used to.

It’s another waypoint on a journey that’s teaching me more than I could have imagined.

And the guilt-free morning?

It’s thanks to my third manuscript, currently with a beta reader for feedback.

A novel I’d never have written if I’d not taken the first one back down from the shelf.

I can’t wait to see what you bring down from yours.

Once you blow off the dust and set to work.

Because I genuinely believe:

Your idea made real.

Makes you, your ideal.

Warmest regards

Your author

Stuart Found